So I was spending my whole day organizing my old blog posts. Reading back all my draft entries and delete all of them and re-update everything...while listening to Shin Chan's videos........of course. All these readings turn me into an emotional woman who misses her younger self. I was happy back then.
By that, I don't mean I don't live happily right now. It's just that my past life was happier, probably because I don't really face problems (my only problem was when I promised not to add anyone else in my bias list and end up falling for another oppa and the list goes on) , haven't face hurtful experience, and my circle of friends - mostly online - don't get really personal we only talked about oppa but managed to love each other.
I was having fun and all good. I don't think I have any problem with my inner side during that time. I mean, I don't hate anyone, I don't hold grudges and I don't curse. The only cause of my depression was when my parents didn't appreciate it when I did house chores lol what even. Oh, and when I fought with my brothers to use PC! hahaha.
I realized that it was so good to be overthink-free. Now I can't even spend a second of not thinking about hurtful stuff that has happened. Listening to k-ballad songs can be terrifying to me too, since now the lyrics have meaning. They were just songs before. Now they do have meaning.
Growing up is not a choice anyway.